Getting a divorce after domestic abuse

If you're considering divorce after experiencing domestic abuse, you may feel overwhelmed, not just by the emotional toll, but by the legal process ahead.

This article is here to support you so you can take the next step safely and confidently.

Can you get a divorce because of domestic abuse?

Yes, you can. Since April 2022, the law in England and Wales has allowed you to divorce without needing a specific reason or proving fault. Under the no-fault divorce system, you need to state that your marriage has irretrievably broken down. Your spouse cannot contest that the marriage has irretrievably broken down, and you don’t need to provide evidence of abuse in the divorce application itself.

This change in the law is especially important for survivors of domestic abuse. It means you can begin the process without having to relive or justify your trauma in legal paperwork. You can apply for divorce on your own, and the process is designed to be more straightforward and less confrontational.

While you don’t need to cite abuse to get divorced, documenting it can still be important for other parts of your divorce, particularly when it comes to the arrangements for any children, financial settlements, and protective orders.

Domestic abuse can take many forms, and the law recognises this. Domestic abuse includes:

• Physical violence
• Controlling or coercive behaviour
• Financial or Economic abuse (such as restricting access to money or preventing you from working)
• Emotional or psychological abuse
• Sexual abuse
• Threats and intimidation

Is it safe to start the divorce process?

Your safety is the most important priority. For many domestic abuse survivors, the thought of starting divorce proceedings can feel frightening, especially if you’re worried that your partner may retaliate or escalate their behaviour. These feelings are valid, and you’re not alone in feeling them.

You don’t need to wait until you feel safe to begin, as this is challenging in an abusive relationship, but it’s important to have a safety plan in place.

This might include:

• Finding a secure place to live
• Changing passwords and securing your devices
• Opening a separate bank account
• Keeping important documents in a safe place
• Telling a trusted friend or support worker about your plans

If you’re in immediate danger, call 999. You can also contact the National Domestic Abuse Helpline on 0808 2000 247, which is free and available 24/7.

Legal protections available during divorce

There are legal measures designed to protect you throughout the divorce process. These can be put in place before or during proceedings, and they are there to help you feel safe and supported.

• Non-molestation orders: These orders can prevent your spouse from using or threatening violence against you or your children, intimidating or harassing you, or coming to your home or workplace.
• Occupation orders: These orders can regulate who lives in the family home and can even exclude an abusive spouse from the property.
• Prohibited steps orders: These orders can prevent your spouse from taking certain actions, such as removing children from your care or taking them out of the country.

These orders can be put in place before or during divorce proceedings. Breaking them is a criminal offence, which means police can arrest the person if they violate the order.

Financial, child arrangements, and housing considerations

Divorce isn’t just about ending the marriage; it’s also about rebuilding your life and recovering your independence. That means making decisions about money, children, and where you’ll live. These issues can feel overwhelming, but there is support available to help you navigate them.

Finances

Financially, the court aim to divide assets fairly. Fair does not necessarily mean the assets should be split equally. If you've experienced economic abuse or left the relationship without resources, the court can take this into account. You may be entitled to spousal maintenance, a share of property, and pension rights.

Child Arrangements

Arrangements for the children are based entirely on what is best for your children. The courts take domestic abuse very seriously. If needed, the court can order supervised contact or restrict contact altogether. You may need to provide evidence of abuse, but your solicitor can guide you through this sensitively. Protecting children from witnessing abuse is a priority.

Housing

Housing can be complex, especially if your spouse owns the home or both names are on the mortgage. Even if the property is solely in your spouse's name, you may have rights to remain there, particularly if you have children. You can register a "home rights notice" which helps protect your position and may allow you to remain in the home while arrangements are being made.

How to file for divorce after domestic abuse

The practical process of filing for divorce is more straightforward than you might think:

1. Check you meet the requirements: You must have been married for at least one year, and your marriage must be legally recognised in the UK.
2. Complete the online application: You can apply through the government's online portal. The fee is £612, but you may be eligible for a fee exemption if you're on certain benefits or have little income.
3. Gather your documents: You'll need your marriage certificate and details about your spouse.
4. Submit your application: The court will review the application and send a copy to your spouse. You do not need to deliver this yourself, and you can request that your contact details (such as your address) be kept confidential.
5. Wait for acknowledgement: Your spouse must confirm that they've received the application. Importantly, they cannot stop the divorce or contest your decision to end the marriage, but must acknowledge it.
6. Apply for a conditional order: After a 20 week reflection period, you can apply for a conditional order (previously called decree nisi). This confirms that the court sees no reason why you can't divorce.
7. Apply for a final order: Six weeks after the conditional order is granted, you can apply for the final order (previously decree absolute), which legally ends your marriage.

The process usually takes about 6 to 9 months. However, if there are disputes about the finances and children, it may take longer. You can still apply for protective orders at any point during this time if your safety is at risk.

Should you use a solicitor or Legal Aid?

If you’ve experienced domestic abuse, getting legal advice is strongly recommended. Abuse cases often involve complex issues around safety, finances, and children, and having someone on your side can make a huge difference.

Legal Aid 

Legal Aid is available for survivors of domestic abuse who meet the financial eligibility criteria. You'll need evidence of abuse from the past five years, such as a police report, medical records, a domestic violence protection notice, or a letter from a domestic violence support service.

If you don’t qualify for Legal Aid, it’s still worth seriously considering instructing a solicitor. A solicitor can help protect your rights, secure fair financial arrangements, and ensure safe contact arrangements for your children. They can also handle all communication with your spouse, which can be a huge relief if contact feels unsafe or distressing. Investing in legal support can make a significant difference to your safety, confidence, and long-term stability.

What happens after you apply for a divorce?

Once your application is submitted:

• The court will send the divorce application to your spouse. You do not need to have any direct contact with them.
• During the 20-week reflection period, you can begin working on arrangements for finances and children. These don’t need to be finalised before the divorce is complete.
• You’ll receive updates from the court at each stage. If you’re worried about your spouse knowing your location, you can ask the court to keep your contact details confidential.

It is important to know that getting divorced does not automatically resolve financial matters or child arrangements. These are separate legal processes that may take longer to finalise. You can obtain protective orders at any point during the process if your safety is at risk.

Taking the first step

Deciding to divorce after domestic abuse takes immense courage.

While the legal process may seem daunting, remember that you don't have to navigate it alone. Support services, legal professionals, and the court system are there to help you move forward safely. Your wellbeing and that of your children must always come first, and the law recognises this.